I realized that the shoe would look nothing like a shoe. I imagined what it would be like to stand right beneath my own shoe, shrunk down so small I could see atoms. I imagined myself nestled among a forest of weird looping trees: the fibers in the weird multicolored-but-still-gray synthetic carpet my school had. When I got bored waiting in line for the bathroom, for instance, I would imagine what it would actually be like to be incredibly tiny. There was the insufferable cartoon of my late childhood, George Shrinks.Īs a kid, I was very easily bored. There was that one episode of The Magic Schoolbus which was pretty much just The Fantastic Voyage in cartoon form. It was the focus of a couple of books I read. When I was a kid, the motif of someone getting shrunk down to minuscule size was popular. That’s 190.5 centimeters, or 1,905 millimeters. I’ve got the reddish beard and the roundish Scots-Irish face and the broad shoulders and the heavy build I inherited from my Scotch and Irish ancestors (the hairy arms come from my Italian ancestors). You can’t see it, but out in the real world, I look like a Scottish pub brawler.
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